Archive for May, 2013

May 9, 2013

It Takes A Village – Of Moms – XP

Original here.

My kids love the reaction they get from people when they randomly announce to strangers, “I have 3 moms!”.  Folks at the grocery store, the couple in the booth next to us at the restaurant…be warned, your reaction and response time is being tested!  I mean, 2 moms is soooo 2008.  3 moms and they are set for conversation starters and ‘2 truths and a lie’ material for life.

As Mother’s Day approaches, I can’t help but think of how blessed my children are to have all these mothers around them to learn from and celebrate.

From their biological mother they have gotten their intelligence and beauty.  As much as I like to joke that I’ve ‘loved them cute’, they came to us like that…stunning, with her beautiful almond eyes, perfect nose, and wide smile.   And dang those kids are smart.  Considering the fact that they outsmart me on the regular, I can’t take any credit for that.

From her they will also learn some very valuable lessons.  They will learn that love spans any amount of time or distance.  They will learn that humility is key to real strength.  They will learn that no matter the depths you find yourself in this life, you keep your chin up and press on.  Even the most unrealistic goals can be achieved and there is no darkness that is impenetrable to the light.

And then they’ve got their mama.  One of the best people in this world. The one I’m so lucky to call my wife.  From her they will learn about generosity and playfulness.  How to throw a ball and be a good sport.  From her they will learn about a different kind of strength – the kind that is quiet and persevering.  The kid that brings you through the worst losses, but still finds you smiling at the other end.

From her they get their warmth.  I remember the first time she hugged me – I had never felt something so warm, and good, and pure.  She loves with a love that is accepting, loyal, and unending and when she loves you, you know it every minute of every day.  They will learn how to love from her.

photo credit: AKD Photography

And from me?  Well, for one, I hope they learn how to pick a great spouse – one that has your back through anything life brings and makes you smile right on down to the tip of your toes.  I also fear that they’ve picked up quite a bit of my passion – there are some very high highs, and low lows in my house (sorry mama!).  But, I know that the ability to chase a dream with every ounce of your being will bring them far in this life…just the way it brought me right to them.


May 3, 2013

Survivors Guilt

The news of Blossom’s reunification was difficult for a number of reasons.  Sad for the foster family, worried for Blossom and bio mom, anticipating hurt and confusion for Sprout, fear about loosing touch with Blossom, and then there was something else.  Something deep and powerful that I couldn’t quite put my finger on for a while.

Well, I know what it is now.  Survivor’s guilt.  Such a strange feeling…tucking my children into bed every night.  MY children.  The ones I get to keep forever and ever.  My happy ending come true.


But why? Why us?

Right time, right circumstances.

It so easily could have been us with the broken hearts and home. Instead, it was someone else this time and I can’t help but think of their pain when I look into the faces of my joy.

May 2, 2013

The Thing No One Tells You About Before Having Children – XP

Original here.

There is a serious downside to having kids that NO ONE talks about.

No, I don’t mean the $$ that magically grows wings and flies out of your pocket, or the new-found need to drink…daily.  Or even the lack of, ahem.

What I am talking about is the silent yet suffocating and ever-multiplying BEAST that lurks in every corner of your home.

What I am talking about is the f-ing laundry!


The more children you have, the worse the problem gets.  I was entirely unprepared for how unruly the beast would get when we said ok our third child.

If you are currently considering adding a 3rd…DON’T DO IT.

Laundry has taken over our lives.

The worst part is the way it steals my joy (the way the dryer steals my socks).  Take for example the beautiful weekend we recently enjoyed.  And by ‘we’ I don’t mean me…

Because while my family was enjoying the sunshine,

Being adorable. Planting a garden.

I was here.

In hell.

You say ‘laundry basket’, I say ‘laundry bastard’

When the kids came in from playing outside, I decided it was about time they got in on tackling the beast.  Afterall, it is THEIR FAULT I’m drowning.  So I handed them each a bastard basket of folded laundry and asked them to put it away.

They stared at me blankly.  “What do you mean mom? Isn’t it away?”


These guys don’t get much use these days.

So I finally make it to the end of my day.  The day spent slaying the beast with washing, drying, folding and putting away.  I want nothing more than to crawl into bed.

I open the door of my room only to find…


I’m haunted by the smell of dryer sheets.

Consider yourself warned.