Today was the long-awaited day of the first court hearing that we were actually invited to attend.  Of all the different ways I imagined this day to go, it turned out to be nothing as I expected. 

In fact, it turned out to be nothing at all.

A and I hemmed and hawed over what to wear and showed up to the juvenile court with butterflies in our stomach exactly 15 minutes before the hearing was to occur.  I was so nervous I checked and rechecked that notice a million times to make sure we had the date and time correct.  One last check before we entered the building and yup, we’ve got it right. This is it.

I knew something was up by the look of the security guard’s face when we entered.  He called someone else over to deliver the bad news.  The time had been changed – the hearing had already been held 2 hours earlier.  What? Are you sure?? Can you check the name again?  We looked over his shoulder at the schedule and sure enough, there were our children’s names, crossed off…completed.  No calls, no emails, no notice of the change whatsoever.

Livid isn’t even a strong enough word to describe how we felt.  9 long months we had been anticipating this day. So hopeful that we’d finally get any shred of information…and just like that, it was taken.

8 Comments to “Court”

  1. Ugh. Typical system. I would definitely be, ahem, expressing myself… to a few people about that. Sounds like next time you may need to pull a Dumbledore. We don’t get specific times here. Everyone has to show up first thing in the morning and just wait until they’re called. Sometimes you’re first, sometimes you wait 4 hours. It stinks, but at least there’s no chance to miss the hearing altogether! I hope you can get accurate information about it out of the worker! One of the best things about court is finding out all kinds of interesting truths. Is there another date coming?

  2. Outrageous! I am so terribly sorry. We have a system like Kate’s. We show up and wait and wait and wait.

    I hope your sw gives you some information and soon! She has to tell you the outcome, that is standard information and not considered confidential.In fact, you may want to complain to her supervisor that you weren’t notfied about changes to time. Foster parents must be given basic info like court dates/times and outcomes.

    Do you have de facto parent status in your state? You might try and apply, you are privy to just about everything after it is granted.

    I am so sorry, I know this is NOT what you need right now. ((hugs))

  3. How rude of the worker to not even call you. 😦

    So frustrating- sorry *hug*

  4. Oh dear. That stinks. So, sorry if this has already been said, are you hoping you’ll be able to adopt the children? Or, you are feeling in limbo and what to know what’s happening next?

  5. Hi Natalie 🙂 Its hard to say what we are hoping for aside from that the children will end up where ever they are meant to and will be best cared for. I know that sounds like a political BS non-answer, but its true. We love them to death and would be so incredibly blessed to adopt them (and we have been named as thier adoptive resource), but we didn’t become foster parents to adopt kids…we did it to help families and provide a soft place for children to land while in limbo. Based on the facts of this case, we do have certain beliefs about where the children would be best cared for (and obviously biased beliefs at that), but if bio mom completes her plan, gets back on her feet, and is the mom they deserve, it would be a victory in our eyes…i’m just doubtful about the probability of that happening. We need more info so we can better advocate for the children.

  6. OMGWTF!! That’s horrible.

  7. Arrrgghhh!!! Raging with you. You need to look up the foster parent bill of rights for your state! Then you need to march it right down to your office! We have rights and one of those should be to attend ANY hearings for these cases. I’m so sorry you missed this! There’s nothing else to say, but that sucks!

    I love, love, love what you said to Natalie. Once again, we find ourselves sharing a heart because I could not have said it better myself: we didn’t become foster parents to adopt kids…we did it to help families and provide a soft place for children to land while in limbo.

    Finally, are you with your county/state DFCS or do you work with an organization?

  8. Thanks for your response. The children are SO lucky to have you as foster parents and advocates.

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