Questions, Questions!

So, over the past couple weeks I’ve gotten some questions in from my lovely readers! Quite exciting, I must say. 

1) How did you decide who would carry?

I figured I’d start with the easiest to answer. And here it is: I don’t have any desire to be pregnant – ever. Lucky for me, it turned out that 1) I married a woman and 2) she does.  I’ve always known I was going to be a mom and pregnancy is beautiful and fascinating to me…but that’s from a distance.  The idea of me getting pregnant and giving birth ranks right up there with skydiving. Not something I want to do ever; but, I can understand why some people put it on their “must do before I die” list. 

I do reserve the right to revise my answer if for some reason A is unable to concieve or carry.  Then, I might consider it, but it wouldn’t be a decision lightly made.

2) Are you going to stop fostering when you have a bio child?

Nope. At least, that’s not our intention at this point.  Even if we get PG within our first couple tries, we’ll have 40 weeks (hopefully) before we welcome a new child into our home.  That is more than enough time to be able to open our home, help, and love a child – or children – in need, or to begin the attachment process with a child who will stay long term. We have no idea how long it’ll take for us to get pregnant and its important for us not to put our life on hold while we’re trying.  Not to mention, we want to foster for a long, long time and having a bio child will not end that goal.  Might we take a hiatus for a couple months to bond with our new baby? Maybe.  It all depends on the specific circumstances at the time.  I certainly don’t foresee us transferring a foster child out of our home, though.  We will just think carefully about the placements we accept over the coming months to try and make sure we get a good match for future plans. 

3. Will you baptize your child?

Okay, this question seemed to come a bit out of left field. But, I’ll play along. 

The short answer is, probably not.  We are a Judeo-Christian household and out of respect for my wife and her religion, I’d never push the issue of baptism…which is essentially assigning our child as Christian. Similarly, if we have a little boy, we won’t be having a Bris. 

To be honest, though, I’m thinking my answer would be the same even if A were Christian.  I believe that religion is most powerful when chosen…not assigned or assumed. So, its our hope to raise our child learning about all the religions, about morals, about different perspectives, and when the time comes they will have the opportunity to choose what works best for them (if anything).

 Any more questions lingering out there? Please feel free to send them my way! I don’t bite. And it excites me to know that people actually read this 🙂

2 Responses to “Questions, Questions!”

  1. love this.

    We get the baptism question too. I need to find a way to say “we don’t go to church and see no reason” without upsetting the relatives.


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